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By JEFFERSON WEAVER
Staff writer
Welcome, Eliza.
Your mom and dad plan to call you Emery Eliza, but as you’ll discover someday, your uncle is somewhat old fashioned. Therefore, I’m going to call you Eliza.
As I write this to you, I already have a score of nieces and nephews, and a few great-nieces and nephews as well. That doesn’t matter, because even though a lot of others came before you, you’re my first from Aunt Rhonda’s family.
A lot of folks are offering your parents advice right now, advice that is both good and bad.
For what it’s worth, I’d rather offer advice to you, since I don’t presume to know anything about raising children. There’s a whole lot I don’t know about a lot of things, for that matter, but I hope you won’t mind a few thoughts from your hairy old Uncle Jeff.
You are being born into a confusing, scary world; it doesn’t show a lot of signs of getting any better. Still, I hope you’ll play a part in making it a better place.
I also hope you won’t give up when you find out, like your parents, your Aunt Rhonda andI, that you can’t always win, but if you try your best, you have no reason to be ashamed.
Your parents and grandparents are special people. You might not always understand why they do some things, and I guarantee sometimes they’ll make you mad. I know them all well enough to know whatever they do, it really is meant to help you or keep you safe or teach you a lesson. You’ll be surprised someday to find out how many of the things your folks taught you will help you after you’re grown. Listen to them, and treasure the time you spend with them. Tell them you love them, and tell them often.
I have to admit, I don’t know your mom’s parents very well, save that your mother’s mother is a beautiful, smart, hard-working lady. She raised her daughter the same way, and I hope your mom raises you like that, too.
Your father’s parents are among the most loving folks I’ve ever met; when my own parents were gone, they adopted me as one of their own. You should hug them a lot.
Someone once joked that the handiest relatives to have were a minister, a lawyer, and a policeman. Your Granddaddy Hill is a preacher, and your dad is a lawyer, so I think you’ve got a good head start.
I hope, Eliza, that you learn your parents’ love for animals. I know you’ll grow up with dogs and cats, and I hope you grow to love them. You will never have a truer friend than a good dog, or a more reassuring companion than a cat. There is great love and comfort in a dog’s wagging tail or a purring cat.
Eliza, I hope your parents take you to church, and teach you about Jesus Christ and his salvation. I also hope you remember that the Bible isn’t just God’s word – as if that weren’t enough – but a guidebook on how to handle just about anything. The people who wrote the Bible knew what they were doing.
Speaking of books, I hope you learn to love reading. It may not be stylish, but reading an actual book is far better than watching TV, playing a video game, or wandering around on the Internet. Books are still your friends when the electricity goes out. Books can teach you things, take you places, and let you meet people you never would have otherwise learned, gone, or met.
I also hope, Eliza, that you have the courage to question things. Don’t be satisfied. Try to learn everything you can about everything, and never, ever let someone lie to you and get away with it. That doesn’t mean you can’t trust people – just make them earn your trust.
I hope you realize just how wonderful this country is, and understand how many people have sacrificed so much so you can do things as simple as read a newspaper, ride your bike down the street, and go to school.
If you make a mistake, admit it. It’s easier to correct one mistake than it is to lie about it and have to fix two mistakes.
Always remember that while you shouldn’t fight – that especially goes for young ladies – if you have to fight, then fight to win. If you know in your heart you are right, never give up, no matter what people say or do.
Remember to forgive people, even when they’ve hurt you very badly. Don’t get mad and carry a grudge. Remember that other people have feelings as well as different ideas. They may be flat-out wrong, and you can tell them so, but you can disagree with people without being ugly about it.
Eliza, I want you to learn about simple, fun things, too, things like mud-pies and dollhouses and tea parties, and baseball and football and dancing with your daddy. I want you to run across a field at your mom’s family farm chasing butterflies, and I want you to wrestle with your dog on a new-mown lawn.
I want you to remember that thunderstorms really can’t hurt you.
I want you to learn how to make your Grandma Hill’s chicken and pastry, and Great-Aunt Wimp’s biscuits. While you’re at it, learn about their pecan pies and coconut cakes, too.
I want you to help Aunt Rhonda and I feed the chickens, frighten the guineas, and dance with the geese. I want you to learn how to scratch Sam the Pig’s belly, and feed him sassafras, like your great-grandpa taught your daddy and your Aunt Rhonda.
I want you to hear about the farmers, bootleggers and preachers in your Granddaddy Hill’s family. I want you to hear how your grandma’s daddy sewed her clothes.
I want you to go fishing with your Granddaddy Hill, surfing with your daddy, and golfing with them both.
I want you to emulate your mother and grandmothers and aunts whenever possible. They’re all good examples of how a lady should act. Use them as examples, but still, always be yourself. Don’t be a phony.
Above all, Emery Eliza, I want you to always be happy, and remember that God loves you, your mom and dad love you, and I love you.
And always remember that while your hairy old uncle might not show it, he’s been as excited as everyone else about you since your parents told us you were going to be born.
Welcome to the world, Emery Eliza, and welcome to a family who loves you.
•Weaver is a staff writer with the News Reporter. He may be reached via e-mail at jeffweaver@newsreporter.biz, or by telephone at 642-4104, ext. 227.
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